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Japan’s life expectancy shortened due to anime addiction

A new study recently done in Osaka has revealed a new truth about Japan’s picture-perfect life expectancy. The study states that “the country of Japan’s life expectancy has been cut down 15 years due to anime addictions across the country.”

This news has come as a shock to all of us. We’ve always been told growing up that watching too much TV is bad for us, but we never knew it could cut glorious Japan’s life expectancy by a long-shot.

Many people have said that these new results should encourage the Japanese to have more babies, since the country is at an abysmal birth rate of 1.4 children. However, most Japanese don’t like to have children because it’s way too expensive. From next to no child care options outside parental care, to expensive schooling, to a whole bunch of other factors, Japan is one of the worst places to raise a child.

But, the only people who aren’t complaining about these life expectancy cuts are, unsurprisinly, the North Korean government. Kim Jong-un released this statement:

“We’re proud that the pathetic lives of the Japanese are being cut short. After all, Japan offends our great country, and we will continue to do everything in our glorious power to keep Japan out of our way.”

– Kim Jong-un

Overall, no one is 100% sure what to do about the issue. Hopefully, the Japanese government will step in and help resolve these issues.

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